La Croix

I am addicted to sparkling water. I love it all–Bubly, La Croix, Aha, generic brands. My husband would argue that he’s also addicted to sparkling water–we go through enough to quench the thirst of an army every week.

But here’s the difference: I am ACTUALLY addicted to it.

I drink a beverage 100% of my waking moments. I drink not one but two pots of coffee every morning (I know, but seriously, it’s the least of my bad habits). The first thing I do when I wake up is run downstairs to start the drip; I have my first cup in hand by 5:45 each morning, and I continue to sip coffee while I teach until noon.

And then I switch to sparkling water for the rest of the day. I simply cannot be without something that I’m drinking.

My therapist has noted this and suggests that I always need to be consuming something. For awhile I tried chewing gum instead, but let’s be honest, that’s an annoying and unsophisticated habit. Much better to be seen with a La Croix in hand, prompting the occasional discussion on how limoncello is the best flavor they’ve ever concocted.

I realize that I need to always be filling, always sating a mouth habit, always consuming. I don’t know whether that will ever go away. I realize that I’m bingeing now on something safer, something better, something that is nothing: no calories, no substance. But, is it really all the same?

Day 76.

Published by Quitter

I’m a college professor, wife, and mother of 2 small kids. I’m on a recovery journey 20 years in the making.

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