I have been bloated my entire life, with the exception of vacations. On vacation, I eat less fruit and vegetables and drink less (well, more alcohol, but less other liquids) because I don’t want to have to pee all the time.

I’ve spent my whole life “sucking in,” because if I didn’t, I would look 8 months pregnant all the time. But lately, it’s been worse than ever. I’m trying to go a more plant-based route this summer, and I know that’s a big part of it. Also, the vegetables I love so much are all bloating culprits–Brussels sprouts, broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage. I eat those by the gallon during the summer, it feels like, and my body doesn’t love that.

I take a daily probiotic/prebiotic, but I don’t know what else do to besides limit those (very healthy) things I really do enjoy. I’ve emailed a nutritionist to see what she may have to say about it. The problem is that I’ve been to nutritionists before who always say, “Oh! You’ll get used to it!” and are delighted that I’m eating so many cruciferous veggies.

I also know that in part, I brought this on myself. Surely 25 years with bulimia messes up gut health and metabolism.

But, I’m tired of feeling distended. I’m tired of waking up feeling already stuffed. I’m tired of eating a single bite of anything at all and feeling like I can’t breathe because I’m so full.

How many days of recovery will it take for things to function properly? How many months until my body can adjust after these 25 years of purging?

Sigh. Day 71.

Published by Quitter

I’m a college professor, wife, and mother of 2 small kids. I’m on a recovery journey 20 years in the making.

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