recovery – I Quit: Giving up Bulimia

Day 397: Life

We had a really wonderful weekend. My husband and I were supposed to go out of town for a concert, but it was cancelled at the last minute, so we stayed at home with nothing to do and a family member in town to watch our kids. The kids’ sports were all cancelled due toContinue reading “Day 397: Life”

Day 392: Sitting with it

Like everyone, I dislike sitting with and in discomfort. I like to feel as though I’m actively doing something about it, or that I’m on my way to something better. But, sometimes there is nothing at all to do but to sit in it. I am uncomfortable in my body. I probably always have been.Continue reading “Day 392: Sitting with it”

Day 391: Doing Something

I wrote yesterday about how my recovery feels strong, but I feel… shaky. One of the main reasons for this is that the issues with my grad school professor surfaced again after a couple decades, I know. So, I decided to do something about it. When he sent the “apology” letter a couple weeks ago,Continue reading “Day 391: Doing Something”

Billie Jean King

I’m flying for a quick trip to visit a friend, and I listened to a podcast I’ve been wanting to hear for awhile now. It’s Glennon Doyle’s interview with tennis legend Billie Jean King, and she talked so beautifully and frankly about so many topics. She suffered from an eating disorder after her retirement fromContinue reading “Billie Jean King”

Happy

I’ve realized that over the past several days, weeks, months, my overriding emotion has been happiness. Or, at least, contentment. I am feeling strong in my recovery and have tried to treat my body with more respect and compassion. I read a book recently which didn’t really provide any new information or insight, but itContinue reading “Happy”

Investments

I’m going strong with recovery and finally feel like I’ve turned that corner when it gets somewhat easier. I’m just home from a vacation abroad with my husband, and at some point I smiled at the knowledge that whatever I ate, no matter how much bread and pasta and wine, I would keep it down.Continue reading “Investments”

Pieces

For the past while, I’ve been seeing my therapist only once a month. This feels both good and bad. I’m “OK” while meeting monthly, though there are often times between meetings when I feel like I could really use a quicker session. But, it’s also forced me to sit with all the feelings and situationsContinue reading “Pieces”

Relentless

I’m doing OK in my recovery and eating. I’m feeling less restless with the recovery and feeling slightly better about the bloating and discomfort. I’ve come to accept that I can’t just stubbornly eat broccoli every day, and I can’t down La Croix all day long without suffering from terrible gas discomfort. So, I’ve temperedContinue reading “Relentless”

Overtraining

I realized last night when I couldn’t sleep that I’ve been experiencing symptoms of overtraining for awhile. Or, I guess I should technically say “overreaching” (the more accurate term for the shorter term, less severe condition). I have been pushing myself super hard the past month or so to work out every day, doing moreContinue reading “Overtraining”

Bloating

I have been bloated my entire life, with the exception of vacations. On vacation, I eat less fruit and vegetables and drink less (well, more alcohol, but less other liquids) because I don’t want to have to pee all the time. I’ve spent my whole life “sucking in,” because if I didn’t, I would lookContinue reading “Bloating”