I’m not the type to count my daily steps. I am an active person, and I am generally on my feet–I know that I am stepping a-plenty. After birthing complications with my second kid led my thyroid to quit, my life spiraled out of control with fatigue and weight gain, and I bought a Fitbit and hated every single minute of maniacally tracking my steps. Once we figured out my thyroid issue and I had meds in hand, the Fitbit went in the trash immediately.

Recently, I’ve identified a restlessness in my weekends. I should say here that I adore my weekends. They are lovely and fun and carefree and full of family time and laughter. (OK, they’re mostly that. They’re also constant sibling bickering and whining and lost shoes.) But, my spring weekends involve a lot of spectating. I watch tennis tournaments, dance classes, soccer games. I sit at all these things. And, I start feeling restless.

Long ago, I gave myself permission to not work out on the weekends. This really demanded a lot from me. It meant that I had to rearrange my work week to fit 5 days of working out, if that’s how many days I was aiming for in a week. It also meant that on particularly tough work weeks, I might go down to 4 (or even 3… 2!) workout sessions and still not force myself to make up those sessions on the weekends, unless I really and truly WANTED to. I’ve mostly made peace with that arrangement, but lately I’ve been feeling the urge to simply move more on the weekends, if not do full-blown workouts.

So, this weekend, I did simply move more. I was amazed that at the end of today, I checked my phone and realized that I’d logged over 10 miles on this very normal Sunday. So, I thought back over the day, and I realized that I walked for my “recovery time” hour this morning (after dropping the kids off at Sunday school… I mean, there’s no RULE you have to stay in the building, right?? It would probably be frowned upon if they knew I was using Sunday school as daycare, but whatever.) And, while I may have looked like a lunatic, when I took my kids to the park this afternoon and let them play and play in the lovely spring weather, I walked circles around them on the trail surrounding the play yard.

Those two hours of steps helped me immensely today. I wasn’t “working out,” but I did feel better to be moving. I’m not sure how this will play out into the future, but I do hope I can keep chipping away at my all-or-nothing mindset and realize that a few steps here or there really can add up; I don’t need to choose between setting out on a 10-mile jog or doing absolutely nothing.

Day 6.

Published by Quitter

I’m a college professor, wife, and mother of 2 small kids. I’m on a recovery journey 20 years in the making.

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